For the second most powerful stimulant, this stuff sure brings me down. I’m getting things done but when I stop moving, I feel like a statue. I can sit and think and nothing is wiggling or fidgeting. I still have the drugged feeling. I hope that goes away eventually. I’m also thinking of asking to have my Zoloft increased, because I still tear up at sentimental videos. But maybe that’s okay. I’m taking a very small dose of that because it made me feel really drugged and kept me awake.
Speaking of sleep, last night was strange. I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia a few years ago, so I’m used to having pain at night. But after having one afternoon of Adderall, playing with my 25+ lb daughter, and doing hair with the bestie, I was super sore all night. Different parts of my back, like concentrated points, and various other parts of my body were hurting. I can’t really explain why. I had to get up at 3 AM and take a muscle relaxer. My only guess is that I spent much more time on my feet yesterday than I’m used to, or I over exerted myself trying to plug a cord in behind the couch. I don’t want to think that taking a stimulant made my muscles tense, leading to the pain later that night, but I’m sure that is also a possibility.
I hate the fact that I’m so out of shape in general. Maybe if plugging in a cord behind the couch wasn’t so strenuous, then I wouldn’t hurt so badly afterward. One of my goals is to get my baby back into shape. It was only seven years ago that I was unloading trucks for hours a day, five days a week. I lifted everything from lawnmowers to air conditioners to boxed furniture to cases of paint (four one-gallon cans of paint). That was when I first started feeling the dobro pain that I assumed was arthritis. But I was still able to do it every day. It was when I stopped unloading trucks and working out that the problems really started to settle in. Now the more out of shape I get, the harder it is to get moving. And I’m not happy with that.